Life, for me, ain't been no crystal stair. I've been saying that a lot, lately, and the Pastor at church said it again on Sunday. What does that mean? I don't think my life has been that hard or that I've had to struggle that much. But, you know what...as I think about it, I realize what I mean. I don't mean that I've had a lot of hard times financially or getting my foot in the door. I mean that I've had to fight some battles, some personal ones that left me scarred, wounded and downright hurt. I mean there have been persons in my life who challenged my naivete, niceness and caused great friction. It feels as if I've had to battle with my family for many years, from the time when I was young--from being molested to be cursed out because of someone else's rage. I guess I always felt picked on and to reiterate that emotion--and to establish myself in pity--I've, recently adopted Langston Hughes' great line from his poem "Mother to Son" when the mother says, "Son, life for me ain't been no crystal stair." At the same time, this line has helped me to humble myself and to just live in the moment. When I say that life hasn't been a crystal stair, I'm really saying that life, right now, ain't no crystal stair. That doesn't mean there won't be one in the future or hasn't been one in the past, but right now, no crystal in my eyesight. I don't doubt that I won't see it in the near future. I'm just coping with this moment the best I can.

In reality, life, for me, has been a crystal stair--in many ways. I've learned how to grow and develop as a human being. I was placed in the gifted and talented program when I was in the fifth grade. In 4th grade, I was reading on a 10th grade level, and by 5th grade, on a 12th grade level. I went to a Magnet High School--my first choice. I went to the only college for which I applied--Lincoln University. I made it to NY on my own. I worked at a great company while I was there. I have talents and gifts that I have yet to recognize. I have many accomplishments. It's important to be reminded to count your blessings.

So, life for me has been a crystal stair. I just have to learn to overcome the obstacles of other people in my life who say they care and want the best for me. I have to care and want the best for myself, more than any of those other people. I am learning to progress. My regression is over. I am going to be me! It sounds cliche, but it's true. My life is meant to be lived. I'm meant to fulfill my destiny, and I do have the desire to do that. I will be successful, and I will make it through this. Why? Because life, for me, is a crystal stair, and I'm climbing all the way up.

See you at the top, or from it!

Love,
Yvette